Thursday, July 28, 2011

The day I saw a man haint! (7-26-11)

She went down there anyways. I tole her not to go. With all the mangos spread over the floor like they was she shoulda undastood like I undastood but she say aint no haint gon tell her who to love and be happy with and who not to.

Ax me a haint know more than me an' her both know put together. I saw him when he slapped the lemons on the ground and the mangos fell. Yes you heard me right. It was a him! And I saw him with my own eyes. I tole Mama an' she tole me to come on in an' take a cold shower an' rub blessed oil on my body so don' nothin' happen to me.

You know it's true don't you? If you see a woman haint with long hair and a hat on then she just comin' to explain a dream to you that you cain't undastan' or she gon tell you some good numbers or special colors to paint your front door or something that's kinda good.

If she don't have no hat on and she got short hair then it mean that somebody is tryina do you harm an' she a tell you who it is and what to do.

Carole Ann say she saw a haint one time that was a woman who had one long pigtail and one short one and she was wearin' paints and no shirt but I don' believe that. Mama say Carole Ann family always was a fib.

But now if you see a man haint then you gotta listen to everything he say and do it word for word. Then you gotta go home and take a shower and smooth yoself in blessed oil to help you remember or something will happen to you. Don't nobody know for sure if it's something bad or super bad because everybody always do like the man haint say.

Man haints don't usually show theyselfs but if anybody see one then they real real lucky. I saw one. He didn't come to see me. But I saw him just the same. Me and Lacy Grace was runnin' 'round Mr. Peter's market. We was just runnin', runnin', runnin'. He tole us to stop all that runnin' but we didn't pay him no mind.

Me and Lacy Grace both had turned ten the month before that. She say now that she was two numbers she could wear some grown up lipstick on her face and have a boyfriend if she want to. Her mama didn't say so, but she say so. Lee Robert ax her to come over past the field and meet him by the big trees and give him a kiss since she was old enough to wear lipstick.

I tole her Lee Robert don' know nothin' about tellin' her to meet him nowhere and he just turn ten years old four months before us hisself. She say Lee Robert tole her he love her in Sunday School an' she was gon sneak off an' give him a kiss in the field.

Everybody know that a kiss in the field is badder than a kiss behind the school or the church but she say she wanna field kiss with Lee Robert. Say she was gon leave when we left the market.

That's when we saw the man haint. Only us saw him look straight at Lacy Grace and point his long skinny fingers an' say she bet not go lookin' for no field kiss an' take her tail straight home. Then he slapped the pile of lemons but it was the mangos that fell. Mr. Peters was standin' right there lookin' straight through the man haint but he thought it was me and Lacy Grace knocked 'em all down with our foolishness. But it wasn't our foolishness at all. It was the tall man haint with no hat and no hair. Mr. Peters didn't believe us. He said we both was a fib 'cause ain no man haint gon waste his time comin' way down to see two fasstail girls.

Lacy Grace ran outta there fast as she could and I look Mr. Peters in the face an' I tell him I wasn' no fass girl an' we did too see a man haint. Lacy Grace was already gon toward the field and I took off too. To take my shower and tell Mama.

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