Sunday, October 31, 2010

Daddy

when the phone rang early like that
i already knew
it was mama and she was cryin
then i knew for sure

"hes...hes..."
he dead huh
cause why put her through
sayin all the words

"you ok?"

yeah im ok

but my daddy was dead
and ask me
i wasnt finished needin a daddy yet
grown as i am and all, but still...
wasnt finished needin some man to say
he was always gon love me and
mean it for real

i called him to tell him
my daddy was dead
and first thing he ax was
did i want him to come over
course i want him to come over
and i said so too
but the quiet lasted too long
so i said no

no you stay there
im ok by myself

i hoped he would know i was lyin
since i had known so many of his

but knowin a lie only matter
if you feel like doin somethin about it

i flew back home
and went straight to his room
called tascha fore i even got on the plane

dont let nobody take his gun
i want that gun
thats my gun

i went straight to the room headin for the closet
but stopped at the bed

next to the bed was a picture of me
taped to the wall
wasnt till right then i knew
it would never be the same again
all grown up or not

i walked to the store and stood in line
and why was the store open anyway
didnt they know my daddy was dead
why the world was planes in the air
and kids at the park
wasnt nothin on the news
about him bein dead

wasnt nobody gon never have my picture
taped next to they side of the bed
my only sister got a husband
so how would she know what that feel like
aquiah got a daddy
so how do she know
she dont
they dont

maybe it aint just me
but right now it is
and thats what matter

tammy say dont be feelin so sorry
for myself
i tell her
this is my space to find
love and peace and the freedom i need to be
and anybody dont
give me room to feel how i wanna feel
in my own space should just go

they should just go
and take they jackets with em

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