Tuesday, October 22, 2013

The talk

Still processing how uncomfortable I am with my niece's basketball coach recently being arrested for sexually molesting a girl my nieces age. According to the report it was no one on the team.that doesn't really make it easier, just another piece of the puzzle. Because she is a minor they are keeping her name out of the paper. I just found out that he was also accused ten years ago of the same thing but I guess because he wasn't found guilty he was able to work with the children. Scary that of the twelve counts he is accused of, one of them is trying to dissuade a victim from testifying. What did come out of this was a healthy conversation with my niece and nephew about the rape culture in which we live.

Immediately my niece and nephew were all like, "he didn't do it." They said that because Coach Gray is a cool guy and he wouldn't do something like that. I explained to them that so many victims don't come forward because they fear people won't believe them, especially when the person accused is someone of power or popularity. "To immediately say that he didn't do it is to say that she is lying and we don't know that. We don't even know who she is." We had a long, healthy, interesting conversation about rape and race and growing up black.

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