Friday, November 14, 2014

It's 7:05 pm and I am at home. This would normally be my end of the night free write but tonight, it's my warm up. I have a lot of writing to do this weekend. An article due tomorrow by midnight and two stories due by 4:30 on Monday for my class. I'm behind. Apartment hunting took a lot of attention and now that that's over I can get caught up on some things. I'm moving slowly. I gave notice to be out of here on the first and I'm probably going to use every single day to move. I moved quite a bit this morning before class, so no, I didn't go swimming. Moving things from an upstairs room to an upstairs apartment by myself ain't no punk. Watch how sexy Imma be. What I'm doing now is taking something to my vehicle every time I go to car. One bookcase, one book, one sweater, one painting, one something at a time. And I'll be moved.

Thanks to an angle from God my bed was purchased yesterday and will be delivered tomorrow between 3 and 7. I never understand four hour windows but...whatever. I'll be there with some thrown together bed linen waiting.

Today is my son's birthday. I'm incredibly proud of him. He hung out with friends yesterday and it seems will be doing the same tonight. I was scheduled to be at a WomanPreach event tonight in Connecticut but didn't want to be gone the same weekend as my son's seventeenth birthday. I hope I see him this weekend but I'm not sure I will. There are things going on. Mostly I want him to have fun. And be safe. We spent last weekend together and he knows his presents are here waiting. Even if we don't see each other this weekend I'm still glad I made the decision to stay (even though the money and experience would have been delicious). I just wanted to give him a choice to be down here or not. I didn't want to say to him that we had to celebrate his birthday another time because I was working somewhere else. There will be other shows. There will. I want him to have a good time.

I have an essay to write on the city of Inglewood that's due tomorrow night. I started a very rough draft and have forever more to go. I need this warm up right now. I'm staying in tonight. I'm getting some things done. This essay for one. Now that some space has been cleared in my head. Oh, same God angle has made it possible for me to copy my students' anthology without cutting it shorter. Praise God. Really. I know the most amazing people. I do. And I greatly appreciate the blessings bestowed upon me.

I'm eating bread again. I'm cutting it out again, soon. Not today though. But soon. Right now I'm munching on my favorite of comfort food. A spicy chipotle burrito with raspberry tea (no ice), and chips ( I got the combo - judge yourself).

So I hired the daughter of a very good friend of mine, my play niece, to go through my email every day. Except she has weekends off. She has been doing a splendid job. She totally gets why I hired someone to do the job. My email every day is a beast. Truly. She calls or sends time sensitive messages to my Facebook account. Love her! When I went to see her tonight, her mother (my friend) and my godmother were at the apartment. There was also a young man who is an astrologer/psychic. He was in the middle of giving V (godmother) a reading. It turned out, I was next. He did say some things that made a lot of sense. To some degree I do give weight to astrology. I sat there feeling my shoulders finally fall from the days work. My last day of class until January. I released the stress and worry over worry and worry money and urgency over how I'm going to cover bills during my time off. Doesn't it always work out? Didn't He, didn't He?! Won't He, won't He?! I began to feel relaxed from the mint, chamomile tea my niece handed me. Let my head rock back and forth to Marvin Gaye's "Let's get it on," while slowing inhaling the incense T stuck in its planter. I never did figure out what it was. But it all had me easy.

It turns out, my sun in in Virgo and moon is in Gemini. "You don't like staying in the same place or the same job too long do you?" He asked.


"Have you had many jobs?"


"And are many of the drastically different from the others?"

"Yes. Even now I'm a writer and sometimes I work as a caregiver."

"That makes since. You wite a LOT!"

"I do."

"The caregiver thing is left over from your past life work. You were some kind of doctor, but a regular doctor. You dealt with some really, really sick people. You used to heal people with leprosy. And you were really good at it."

Oddly that didn't surprise me.

He said some other things I don't chose to share here but I'm glad I saw him. I left quickly so that I could use the last bit of daylight left to drop off another load from my home to my new home. I'm going to end this warm up and get started. I'm officially procrastinating. Also I took my meds already and they make me mad sleepy. Well, worst case, I'll get a draft done and work on it like a dog on a bone tomorrow.

I have a women's writing group to attend tomorrow around the same time as the bed is due. I've missed the last three months and hate to miss again. I gotta be there for this bed though. Also gotta get the essay done. We'll see. Early in the morning I'm going to load my car with as much stuff as I can get in it and unload while I'm waiting for the bed to come.

This sleeping pill is sooooo kicking in.

Let me get started on this essay. Oh, the fourth anniversary of Red Story is this Sunday. Come out if you can. It will be at the same place, Vibrations 2435 Manchester in Inglewood and same time, 7:30.

I hope to see y'all soon.

I make lists. I love lists. This is my list of things to get for (transfer to) my new apartment:

1. White hangers for my closet. Because I like uniformed hangers.
2. Full sized bed linen
3. Pillows
4. Really cute shower curtain. Cute shower curtains are important.
5. Rug for bathroom floor
6. Swiffer
7. Flowers
8. Candles
9. Couch
10. Chest of drawers
11. Art
12. Art supplies
13. Clothes
14. Hats
15. Books
16. Rug
17. Bookcase
18. DVD player
19. Full mirror
20. Towels
21. Washcloths
22. Plates
23. Bowls
24. Pots
25. Pans
26. Glasses
27. Wine glasses
28, Lighter for candles
29. Cleaning supplies
30. Truck to move couch
31. Television
32. Television stand
33. Dish soap
34. Bubble bath soap
35, Incense
36. Sage
37. DVDs
38. Plants
Today is my son's seventeenth birthday! I'm so proud of him!

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Hard saying so long to my students today. I love them. Every one of them. I do. I'll miss them. I'm still ready for a break.

Excited about moving into my new place. Doing it slowly. I'll probably be moved in by the first. We'll see.
Picked up my meds. Sleep is easier. I love easy sleep.
Feeling happy. My son's birthday is tomorrow. He turns seventeen. Seventeen! I'm so proud of him.

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

The country celebrated Veteren's Day yesterday and I constantly thought about my Vietnam army vet father. He used to talk to me about his time in the war. Not often, but sometimes. Told me that his job was to collect dead bodies of other soldiers. Sometimes the bodies would split in his arms when he picked them up. You don't get over something like that. You just don't. I don't think he did either.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

I don't like hearing people chew
The sound grains in my soul
It sounds like kissing
Kissing is personal
Food is personal
The sound of people chewing
The pop of gum
Sounds that come out of mouths
That are not words or music
Claw into my skin
Like claws
Like scratches
Like needles on a chalkboard
Some sounds are whispers
Are secret
Are private

Because sometimes a writing prompt is ten minutes on any item in my bag...

I need it. Now the length of my pinky finger, too dull to be real good. I need a new one. Black is my favorite, but sometimes I go for brown. What I look like without crafted streaks cross my forehead? Fuck a good hair day. A good brow day always make the difference. Plus, it smell a little like a Crayola crayon. I don't know.

It's the last thing I put on before I head out the door. It takes skill, you know? Maybe you don't. Funny, something I get once a month from the dollar store make me feel so some kinda way. Way it lines my eyes and tell folks, Here I am. I'm tired maybe, but I shol am here. I don't need or want all that other foolishness and time wasting paint, but this... this right here!?!

I'm a simple girl. I ain't not girl at all. Girls ain't neva come grown as me. Not me. All I been through and everything. Yep. Whether I put it on thick or thin it's there if you look. See? Blink blink. Can you see? Like what you see make the difference. Silly me. Maybe I'm just a girl after all. Ain't we all though? Nothin' but fass tail eighth grade boys and girls runnin' 'round here thinkin' we somethin'.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Maybe I will get some sleep tonight. That is certainly the plan. I've been in bed for two hours. I'm not close. And that's okay. Ideas are rushing through my head. About shows. Another tour. Possibly. Maybe. About product. About rent and bills and blessings and stuff.

I told you I couldn't sleep. You knew another free write was coming. Didn't you? There will be more.
One of my students asked me how a pager worked. I told her someone would call your pager number and enter their number. You would go to a pay phone and call the number and hopefully connect with the person. She said "Dang, all that?!"
I had a long day today. I'm blessed. I really am. I went swimming early this morning. Cut it short about ten minutes because I wasn't feeling all the way...way. I don't know. Glad I went though. Taught two classes. My first set of teens were more than a handful. Way more. My second class was bliss. I'm so proud of these children. I do love every one of them. Course I did have an episode of a student pulling a blown up condom out of his back pack. There was a condom wrapper on my vehicle after class too. Don't know what's up with it being condom day but I'm glad they know how to purchase them. I think. Found out I got the apartment. We like that. Met with manager. Went to class tonight. I'm in a fiction writing program at USC called Community Literature Initiative (CLI). I am learning so much. I highly recommend it. Home now. Free writing because I gotta get these words out. Hopefully I will sleep tonight. I didn't last night. Blah blah blah.