Can't turn away from the news and there is too much too sad to watch

i am too old or too emotional or too sensitive or too hormonal or too much too something for the news tonight and i cant turn away and i dont have the energy to write a real poem so this freewrite is all that you get and all i will give myself and one story after the next is heavier than the last

one high school girl is stabbed to death by her high school boyfriend and i feel sorry for them both yes him too yes his family too and this is a lot then another woman is on the freeway and her truck turns over and catches fire and people rush out and put the fire out on her burning body with the shirts off of their backs and she lived but her nine year old daughter is dead trapped in the truck and who can hear that after the girl was stabbed to death

then a high school cheerleader died at a game just dropped dead and why and nobody knows and what can we do about all of this

i cant turn away because i might miss one more thing and i hope that there are no more things tonight but there are always more things

and now it doesnt matter that the weatherman says that sunday will be beautiful and couldnt he have found another word because what about the parents of the dead cheerleader and she will not think tomorrow is beautiful because she has a funeral to prepare for and she didnt count on this

and it is not the weathermans fault but isnt it easier when it is someones fault and thank God for words and blogs and poetry even though this isnt much of a poem just words ok just words instead of tears about the dead cheerleader and girl stabbed by her boyfriend and who knows what else there is that they are not telling us about

and suddenly i am so sensitive to everything and why and when did this happen and is this what happens when your period stops and where there was blood now there are all of these tears and softspots in your heart for people you dont know and cravings for two tacos for one dollar at jack in the box

and there arent people you dont know because they are all me and i am all of them and tv is stupid and thank the joy of life for not having to make this entry of whatever it is make sense to you

you get it or you dont you feel it or you wont and now they are talking about saving the sea lion on the street so maybe that means that there are no more dead cheerleaders or stabbed high school girls but then they mention two cops that were killed and why did they talk about the cops after the sea lion and shouldnt the cops matter more than a sea lion caught on the street and how did he get there anyway

5335 are the lottery numbers if you care at all about the lottery in california

#maybeillneverunderstand