Dream

I had a dream last night that I was at a party at a house next door to where I grew up. In the dream that house was my house and there were people next door (my house, the house I grew up in) who we kept arguing with. At one point I went outside with a guy I was dating (a guy I actually dated, a real hot head, contstantly trying to get a fight started). The guy from next door (who looked a lot like the rapper Eminem). My guy and the other guy maddogged each other for a moment then both were going back into the seperate houses until my guy said something. Just haaaaad to say something. I don't even remember what, but something to which the other guy responded, "Ok, I got a coupla guns inside now." After that everyone at the party where I was was instructed to get down, hide, stay low. We all stayed in our positions, waiting. I was so angry at my guy for saying what he said when he could have just let it go.

Now, maybe the guy would have come out with the guns and shot us all whether someone said something to him or not. Maybe my guy saying something to him was the best thing because it allowed us to see what was in the other guy's mind and we could prepare and brace ourselves for his rage. I don't know. I only remember us all there hiding behind tables and each other. Waiting.

That's what life feels like sometime. Everyone waiting for something bad to happen. Waiting.

My dream last night

I had a dream last night that I was in a public restroom stall. I could hear a mother with her daughter in the stall directly across from me. I sat on the toilet waiting for them to leave. When I heard them leave I came out and was in front of the mirror buttoning my pants. The mother immediately came back into the restroom as if she knew I was waiting for them to leave.

She looked Arabic, in her early fifties and had her hair covered in a dark blue or black scarf. She approached me slowly and came very close to me. I was silent. Watching. Still.

"My daughter says a man touched her. She won't stop crying. She told me the same thing happened to you."

And then she left.

Dream

In my dream last night I was driving a black Ford Escort on the west side of Long Beach near where I grew up. I was in an area that looked like Willow St. just before Pacific. I suddenly stopped my car in the fast lane.

Side bar. I don't know if that's lane four or one. I should know that! My driver's license is expired and I have to take the test when I get back to California in a week. But back to my dream.

I stopped the car in traffic, gently held a beautiful empty crystal champange glass and walked across the street and then up the block a bit. I left the car door open then I noticed a police car coming toward the car. I hurriedly headed to the car and reluctantly threw the crystal glass on the grass.

I remember praying along the way to the car that the police not ask for my license because it is an expired Georgia license. I remember praying that I not go to jail about my license.

Note to self: Hurry up and get license taken care of. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Do not get beans rice and cheese burrito from El Pollo Loco. Go straight to DMV when you get back to Los Angeles.

When I returned to my car (which somehow now was not on Willow St. anymore but on the street I grew up on) the police was gone and I drove off. Only when I drove off I was riding a bicycle. I was so happy the police didn't stop me for my license I don't know if I registered the significance of my riding a bike from where my car was parked.

I know that the setting of a dream is relavent so here it is, as much as I can recall. It was daytime. Probably about 4ish based on the traffic. Sunny.

That's it. Until next dream.

Dream?

Last night
I had a dream
I was cleaning out
An apartment
My apartment
An apartment I don’t know

I was busy
I was angry
I was screaming at
An ex lover
Who will remain
Nameless
Until I get over his name
(this is an old poem)

He came to my house
To collect items he had
Given to me
How dare he

But I gave them to him
Because they were his
And not mine
I had me
And that was enough

That was more
I had won

In the dream
A fish appeared
An orange and yellow
Large flying fish
Flying around my apartment
My dream apartment
That I had never known
A home I would not choose
This fish
This flying fish

A fish out of water
Cleaning house
Finding home

My dream (lesson) last night

In my dream last night I was sitting outside at a table with maybe two other people. A beautiful parrott flew right to me. I was afraid at first but then became relaxed. The man across from me picked up the parrott and broke its neck. Right in front of me. Easily, as if nothing was wrong. He laid the bird down on the bench and I was horrified. There was no sound. None. I could see mouths move and other motion but couldn't hear anything.

I remember leaving the table and telling everyone I could about the bad man who killed the beautiful bird. That was my mission. I told everyone. Then I ran into someone who told me to follow him. I did and we went to the place where it all happened. The same table, the same day, the same circumstances. I even saw myself sitting there. Everything was the same, except this time there was sound. This time I could see what I didn't see before and hear what I couldn't hear before.

I thought in silence we were having a friendly lunch but as it turned out, the other man sitting next to me, who seemed very kind, was actually threatening the "bird killer" and told him that if he didn't kill the bird right then, then his family would be killed. I could see sorrow in the man's face as he put the bird's head in his hands and saw him cringe as the neck snapped.

I woke up remembering sooo many details about this dream. When this happens to me I know it's a lesson for me to surely remember. A lesson for me, a lesson for all who hear it. It's too easy to walk away and tell everyone what you think you know about a situation. It's too easy to judge. Too easy to lable someone. There is always something we can't see, something we can't hear, something we don't know.