Moving hiccup

I got the money I needed yesterday for an apartment. I really want the apartment I last applied for. I still hope I get it. I'm trying not be attached to any outcome thought. Having the move in fees puts us far along in the game. I am ready to move in when a management company says yes. And someone will say yes. Until then, the move in money is put away and we will keep adding to it an living off of my art and jobs. Oh, and I got another new client. I know I said I wasn't going to take on any. I even declined a couple recently. Right now, I need to build this nest egg. So I'm gonna do it. I'll be doing overnights with her for about four nights a week. Like from 9p to 7a. Anyway, about apartment. I was eagerly awaiting Andrew's call yesterday about the place. I didn't hear from him for much of the day and was concerned. When I did hear from him he said that he called and left message with management company and did not get a call back but that he would be on it today. I don't really have good feelings about him not getting a call back yesterday. I'm interpreting that as a no but it could be anything. I'm going to keep breathing and keep working and keep praying. Oh, I got booked for a gig yesterday and thankfully the payment was sent yesterday also. That's how Uraeus and I were able to get this room last night. I'm keeping that move in money nice and safe in savings. I'm not going to be in the situation I was in, trying to hurry up and come up with it. Nope. Also I bought some new canvases last night. I ran into Kamasi Washington in Michael's. It was good seeing him. I am so incredibly proud of him and his success. I love it when the good ones win.

It's 4:59am and I am still up. I say still because it doesn't feel like I slept at all last night but I know I must have. Oh, Uraeus and I went to see Queen & Slim yesterday. I loved it. A couple folks at The Stage Wednesday night were talking shit about it, but I thought it was good. One brother said he felt like the writer must hate the black man. Really? Shut the fuck up! How much music and movies and everything is out disrespecting Black women? Please! And the movie didn't disrespect Black men. Like I said, shut the fuck up.

In other news, the cable in this hotel sucks ass. There are like ten channels and not all in English either. And there are no crime shows. No Law & Order or Criminal Minds or Chicago P.D or NCIS New Orleans. Fuck! I'm a little bit angry and I'm trying to work it out. Not about the cable. About other stuff. I missed my appointment with the doctor yesterday. I straight out forgot. I don't know how I did that. This visit was important too. I need to see this doctor before I can see a therapist. That's who I really want to see. I'm not ready to go back on my meds. Even though I might need to. I'm just not ready. I need to feel. You know what I mean? The meds really numb you. And that's a good feeling too sometimes but I need to feel.

I'm finally getting sleepy so I think I'm gonna close this computer before the sun comes all the way up and I can't sleep. Please pray, y'all. Pray for me. I'm trying to level up while getting through this the best way I can. I'm also worried. I'm worried about my cousin. His trial starts tomorrow. I'm scared as shit of him going to jail. Even for one day. I don't want that to happen. Ok. I'm really really sleepy now. You get some rest too.

Love yourselves