16 x 20 acrylic on canvas. And so it begins.

22 x 28 acrylic on canvas

Family

My art

Flowers

Tchsie, Sequoia, V, me, Pam at The World Stage rehearsal for I didn't survive slavery for this

Prayer

I had a long and beautiful day today. Got up and wrote a little. Prayed. Gave thanks for the blessings and lessons in my life. I recorded with Sage on his new cd coming out soon. So proud of him and the phenomenal work he does. Can't wait to hear the finished product. Went to work. Still teaching poetry at summer school. Love it. The students were...off today. We all were. And it's cool. Kat, Noelle, Uraeus and I went to have dinner and ran into Paul. Great seeing him. Great laughing and sharing stories with friends. Great listening to my son and the ideas that come out of his head. Uraeus and I had a couple of errands to run after that but we are home now. It's 10 now and I'm training my body to get bed sleepy about this time. It's working. Good night and love to all of you.

An acrostic poem a day for July 2014 - for day 20 - Laughter, stories, friends, family

Love easy this blue sky day
After class and bumper to bumper traffic
Uraeus and I with Kat and Noelle
Gather at Sky's for food and fun
Hearing stories about
Today and plans for tomorrow sipping lemonade this
Evening loving this life and this
Right now

Singing old songs remind us
To remember each other in prayer
Our hearts know that we are each other
Right and left our loved ones all around
Inside we smile at the smooth of the moment
Effortless as marble
Sweet as cheesecake

Freedom looks like this
Rows of tables and sounds of people who love each other resting
Inside and out under umbrellas
Eager to learn more about soul behind the smile
New ideas and times and way we
Do life has emerged and we
Say yes to the new and embrace the old

Forgiving and loving and moving forward
Aiming higher than the generation before
Me and my people
In all this good
Love and joy and we get full and lean back and just say
Yes and yes again

Kat, Noelle, Uraeus, me, Paul

Fingers crossed

I will be in New York (with my mom, who has never been to New York!) from September 30 to October 5! I am currently raising funds with the product I have. If you see a painting you like please know that they are all available for purchase. Also I still have my poetry / music cd, Simple like a daisy and my audio book, The soundtrack of my together. You may also pre order my soon to be released chapbook, Dear Uraeus - letters to my son. See you soon NY!

Release

I unplug from smog and worry
I go to the top of the mountain
Where I commune with the Creator
Over jasmine tea
With Gregory Porter and the thunder in the distance

I am safe there in the arms of sky
There near the whisper of the
One who knows me best

I dance there with water falling on my face
Sun on my head

Obatala is pleased
Oshun smiles
Buddah laughs
And Jesus knows

My shoulders fall
My back is got

I am safe
I am free to dance and move

Do you dance
Do you hold our arms high and
Twirl your dress

Do you spin you neck
And remind yourself
God lives in you

I unplug and go to the rock

I'm so rock
I'm so ready
I'm so heavy

Are you brave
Are you free
Are you unplugged along with me

Do you want to move with me
Do you want to spin me 'round and 'round
And see how fast I go

This is the safest space I know

Are you ready
Are you Zulu quite enough

Choosing differently free write

I started writing them down. All the memories. All the time I swallowed my words because I didn't want to hurt someone's feelings. I wrote letters, blog posts, notes on cards, journal entries, whatever I could think of to get the anger out instead of keeping it in. Getting it out was my best way to overcome it. I was sick enough. All the anger was the root of it.

It wasn't just one thing. There were so many things wrapped in one grande burrito I kept adding ingredients to but would never digest. A breakup here. A loved one lost there. Stress over money, time, health. I'm still in the process of letting it all go. The worry over worry. The worry over who, when, what and why.

The older I get, the more I know that nice is not woman's work. Not always. Some folks need a good cussin' out, you know? And that's okay too. 'Cause it's good for a woman's body. Some of my male folks could stand to be called out on their sexist ways. And maybe it will take the meanest voice I have for them to listen. There are some white folks will just have to handle me not being their only black friend. I'm about fed up being their educator on all things ethnic. Some family members could use a taste of the words I'm holding too. It's old now, being the easiest one to make jokes about.

I am overcoming the anger held inside. I'm choosing differently now. Someone else can have it. It ain't doing me no good. What I always did was suck it up and save feelings. Everybody's but my own. I ain't got no cheeks left. Got no made up nice words neither. Just these raw ones come ready from my gut.

It's a different day and time to do it a different way. Life is too short to not be happy from the inside. Folks can leave if they want to. I'm minding my mind these days. Can't just let anything and anybody in any more.

There was a me that used to bite my tongue and let folks be disrespectful and self righteous and downright demeaning. Well, that me is dead now. And you motherfuckers killed her.