Respect

I feel for my trans family who have family who constantly and purposely misname and misgender them. I wasn't born as Jaha and I have family who tell me "I can't call you Jaha." The difference with me though is that I never asked my family to stop calling me by my given name. Old friends, people I went to school with, family still call me that and I don't have a problem with it. But here's the thing. What if I did have a problem with it? Would my wish be respected? Probably not. And what if I didn't choose to identify as a woman? Would that choice be respected? I can almost say certainly not. So when our trans sisters and brothers come out to their families imagine what they have to deal with. We don't know how they could be triggered by being called by the name that they didn't choose. Or called a man or woman when they identify as the opposite / another. What does it hurt anyone to call their loved one by the loved one's preference? Don't ask people what their "real" names are. Why? Are you writing them a check? Are you booking them a flight? My name is whatever I tell you my name is. Maybe it's not a big deal to you but it's not about you. It's about someone you love. Let's think about the ways we push others away from us.