What's so. Fear and faith. This mind and body.

Sometimes I am all about that Lizzo life and I'm feeling good as hell and there are other times and sometimes at the same times as the Lizzo times when I am wildly uncomfortable with my body with this flesh that has stretched and fallen and I should be all about that big girl life but then what the fuck are shoulds and who the fuck needs a should anyway and my gait is slow and unsteady way I walk up and down stairs one step at a time and my homegirl is in town and the birdie on my shoulder who is not my friend keeps telling me not to call her because why shock an old friend with all this gut and the same birdie wants me to know that these dudes these days ain't 'bout fucking fat Black bitches and all I wanna know is who the fuck birdie is calling a bitch